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Relationships... Falling in Love

Most of us consciously attempt to differentiate from our families at around the ages of thirteen to eighteen. For some it is earlier and for many it stretches through to middle age or onward. For some it never ends. The pull toward separateness and togetherness is a constant and each attempt illustrates mankind's eternal dilema.

This can be seen in many ways but a great example is the loyalty a man feels for his mother and his wife. The march of civilisation is endlessly shown in the moving away from the original home (mother, father, childhood) to eros and love (sweetheart, partner, and the new world of "couples").

Fears arise when the individual moves from a position of knowing (old known and approved, accepted and enjoyed ways of being) to the new, encountering risks, loss and the inevitable drawing away from ties long held dear. Parallel to these sad and fearful times, as the move is made, is the joy and excitement of what may happen. This is what moves us. And perhaps this is why we need the limmerance (honeymoon) period in the love cycle to allow us to take the risk. In order to move we must die a little, but as we die in the old way of living we grwo and become transformed.

Do we know what we are doing...

Well. probably not. And this is what this section is about. If we don't kow what we are doing how can it work out well? Blind faith just might not be enough.

• Médecins Sans Frontières
• International Fund for Animal Welfare
• Grassroots.org
• Save the Children Australia

© 2000 - 2009 Relationships — choosingchange.com.au Philip Johnson